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生命最后100天的思索:我为什么这么生活

[日期:2007-12-20]   [字体: ]
尤金·奥凯利最后100天的生命旅程是否对你有所触动呢?即使死亡的阴影不曾靠近,我们是否也该像他那样适时放慢脚步,重新思考生命的价值,重新审视自己的事业、思索生活的意义?

 Eugene O'Kelly was at the top of his game. The 53-year-old chairman and chief executive of KPMG1) in the US was working hard, supporting a happy family, maintaining a busy social life and making plans for a long, well-earned retirement.


In May 2005, he went for a check-up with a neurologist2) to investigate a slight facial droop. A scan revealed he was suffering from terminal brain cancer and had only three months to live.

As Mr. O'Kelly explains in Chasing Daylight, his account, published posthumously, of his final weeks of life, he looked on this news as a kind of blessing. He would have 100 days to make a good death: to say goodbye to colleagues, friends and family, and to plan a future for his wife and children. Like the accountant he was, Mr. O'Kelly wanted to close the book on his life and leave his affairs in good order.



The diagnosis also got him thinking about his career and what it had truly meant. "Before my illness, I had considered commitment king among virtues," he writes. "After I was diagnosed, I came to consider consciousness king among virtues.?"

Mr. O'Kelly now believed, like Socrates, that "the unconsidered life is not worth living.?And he felt sorry for colleagues and peers who had not had the chance to reflect more seriously on their lives.

"I lamented that they had not been blessed as I had, with this jolt to life," he writes. "They had no real motivation or clear timeline to stop what they were so busy at, to step back, to ask what exactly they were doing with their life. Many of them had money; many of them had more money than they needed. Why was it so scary to ask themselves one simple question: why am I doing what I'm doing?"

But of course that is a scary question — because the honest answer may be devastating3). Having chosen their career path at an early age, some professionals find themselves at or near the top of their organisations in their mid-40s to late 40s. With good health and solid finances they may have another 40 years of comfortable living ahead of them.

Money is not the problem. Fulfillment is. Career goals may have been met, but the excitement and pleasure the job once offered are now a distant memory. Worse, there may seem to be no alternative to going on in this way for another 10 or 15 years.

It must be a dismal prospect. No wonder so many bosses prefer to keep their heads down and carry on as though all is well. But pursuing an ultimately meaningless career saps the will to live. It destroys family life. Eventual retirement looms not as a release but as a daunting life sentence.

Perhaps the word "career" is part of the problem. The writer Charles Handy believes we need to think differently about how we approach the business of earning our living over the course of five decades.

Instead of one career, we can have several lives, he says. We should experiment, move on, not consider the corporation as a kind of parent or safe-house. People who have had only one life tend to be rather boring, professor Handy adds.

But, as Mr. O'Kelly writes, the hurried executive finds little or no time to conduct this sort of analysis. The very busy-ness of business militates4) against reflection.

The new wave of twenty-something job applicants have wholly different expectations — and demands. Even blue-chip5) recruiters are being challenged to explain what sort of "work-life balance" they will offer to their new employees. How flexibly can people work? Will sabbaticals6) or career-breaks be available?

A recent "campus brochure" for PwC7) in the US showed a young man cartwheeling8) on a beach, beside the slogan: "Your life. You can bring it with you.?

  尤金·奥凯利正值事业的巅峰时期。这位53岁的美国毕马威会计师事务所的董事长兼首席执行官,工作努力,家庭幸福,社交生活忙碌,正规划着长远而舒适的退休生活。

  2005年5月,他到神经科医师那里做了一次体检,对轻微的面瘫进行检查。扫描显示,他患有晚期脑癌,只能活3个月了。

  正如奥凯利在他讲述自己生命最后几周生活的自传《追逐日光》(在他死后出版)里所说的那样,他把这条消息看做是一件幸事。他有100天的时间来为自己的死亡做准备,使之不留遗憾:向同事、朋友和家人告别,为妻儿妥善规划未来。出于会计师的本能,奥凯利希望将自己人生的账本结算清楚,把身后的一切事情都安排得井井有条。

  这一诊断还促使他思考自己的事业以及它的真正意义。“在发现生病前,我一直认为责任是首要的美德,”他写道。“在被确诊后,我开始认为自觉才是首要的美德。”

  和苏格拉底一样,奥凯利现在相信:“不加思考的人生毫无价值。”他为那些没有机会更加严肃地思考自己人生的同事与伙伴感到遗憾。

  “他们没有我这样幸运,可以经历这一人生的突变,我为他们感到难过,”他写道。“他们缺乏真正的动机,也没有明确的时间计划,未能暂停手头忙碌的事情,退后一步来问问自己生命的意义何在。他们中的很多人很富有;许多人的金钱远远多于他们所需要的。可为什么他们会如此害怕问自己一个简单的问题:我为什么这么生活?”

  不过,这确实是一个可怕的问题——因为诚实的回答可能是毁灭性的。一些专业人士年轻时就选定了职业道路,在45岁和49岁之间已经发展到或者接近组织的最高管理层。他们拥有健康的身体和殷实的财力,以后可能还有40年的舒适生活等着他们。

  金钱不是问题。问题在于成就感。事业目标可能已经实现,但是,工作曾经带来的激动与快乐现在已成为遥远的回忆。更糟糕的是,在未来10年或 15年的时间里,事态似乎只能朝着这个方向发展。

  这番展望肯定令人消沉。难怪那么多的老板宁愿埋头苦干,继续忙碌,就好像一切都很正常。但是,追求最终毫无意义的事业会侵蚀生存的意志。它会破坏家庭生活。最终的退休不会是一种解脱,倒像是令人畏缩的无期徒刑判决。

 “事业”也许是问题的部分原因所在。作家查尔斯·汉迪认为,我们有必要从不同的角度去思考我们在50年的时间里如何谋生。

  他说,我们可以经历多种生活,而不是仅仅拥有一项事业。我们应该不断尝试,不断前进,不要把公司当作父母或安全的藏身之地。汉迪教授补充说,只经历过一种生活的人一般比较乏味。

  但是,正如奥凯利所写的,他这个忙碌不堪的主管很难或者根本没有时间来进行这种分析。日常工作的忙碌妨碍了他进行反省。

  而二十多岁的新一代求职者拥有完全不同的期望和要求。甚至连最出色的招聘人员也面临挑战,他们得解释以下的问题:他们将向新员工提供什么样的“工作和生活平衡”?人们能够在工作中拥有多大的灵活性?公司是否提供休假的机会?

  在美国普华永道会计师事务所最近的校园宣传册上,一位年轻人正在海滩上翻着筋斗,旁边印着这样的标语:“你的生活。你可以随身携带。”

  1. KPMG:毕马威会计师事务所,全称为Klynveld Peat Marwick Goerdeler,全球最著名的会计师事务所之一,设有由优秀专业人员组成的行业专责团队,致力于提供审计、税务和咨询等专业服务。

  2. neurologist [njuE5rClEdVIst] n. 神经科专门医师

  3. devastating [5devEsteItIN] adj. 破坏性的

  4. militate [5mIlIteIt] vi. 产生作用或影响

  5. blue-chip:第一流的

  6. sabbatical [sE5bAtIkEl] n. 周期性的休息日

  7. PwC:普华永道会计师事务所,全称Pricewater- houseCoopers,国际四大会计师事务所之一,主要提供审计、税务及咨询等服务。

  8. cartwheel [5kB:thwi:l] vi. 做侧手翻
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